TO FACEBOOK OR NOT TO FACEBOOK

To Facebook or not to Facebook…that is the question for me right now. You see, there are things that I love about Facebook: animal pictures and videos, memes, GIFs, pictures of my friends (and their kids and pets), and pretty much anything funny. Then there are things that I hate about Facebook: politics, mean people, arguing, and belittling. With COVID-19, the upcoming election, and everything else going on the world, I see more and more of the things I hate.

I get on Facebook for the happy stuff. That doesn’t mean that I don’t have opinions about things, or that I don’t care—I do. I care a lot. But just like 99.9% of the people who use Facebook, I think what I think, and my views and opinions are probably not going to change. When someone who disagrees with me tells me (or insinuates) that I’m stupid because I don’t think like them, I’m not going to listen to anything they have to say. If someone becomes so emotionally charged that they resort to insults and name-calling, I can’t take them seriously. Why would I listen to someone who hurls insults and behaves irrationally?

As an example of current debates, let’s talk about masks for a moment. There are two sides here. The pro-maskers call the no-maskers selfish. The no-maskers call the pro-maskers sheep. The pro-maskers believe that if everyone wears masks, the probability of catching the virus is reduced. The no-maskers think that the masks do nothing to prevent the spread of the virus, and many believe that the government is grooming us to accept total control. Both sides are 100% sure that they’re right. But who is right?

Neither and both are what I’d say, but how can that be?

Well, because the virus is invisible, we can’t see if it’s lingering in the air. We can’t see someone breathe it in, nor can we see a mask stop it from making its way into someone’s mouth. We have a governor who says face coverings are imperative, and then it seems only seconds later that we see a group selfie with him not wearing a mask. Some tell us that masks don’t help, then a month or so later, they flip the switch and say how much they do help. And what about someone who diligently wears their mask but then touches their face after coming into contact with an infected surface (again, another thing we can’t see)?

On the flip side, there are plenty of doctors, nurses, and scientists who believe that if everyone wears a mask and washes their hands, the probability of spreading the virus will significantly decrease. These are people who have had years of training and first-hand experience. They’re guided not by political opinions or hidden agendas, but by knowledge and expertise. I have friends who are nurses, and I’ve never seen them post about politics, so I firmly believe that when they post about the importance of wearing a mask, the intent is to simply educate and promote safety precautions.

My point is that the parties on both sides of this debate (as well as any other discussion) honestly believe in what they’re saying. The no-maskers don ‘t think they’re selfish; they think the pro-maskers are gullible. The pro-maskers don’t think they’re gullible; they believe they’re helping to eliminate the spread of the virus.

I don’t think either is wrong. I, of course, have my own opinion on this and other matters, which I’ll keep to myself because   1. I know I can’t sway anyone, and I don’t want to roll out the red, “Let’s Argue,” carpet, and,  2. Life is too short to argue with people who can’t hear past their own beliefs and opinions.

Each individual is different. We perceive the world differently because we all have unique experiences that shape our beliefs, and various opinions usually each hold some bit of truth. I may meet someone and come away from the encounter thinking that person is rude. You may meet the same person the next week and find them charming and delightful. Which of us is right?

Maybe when I met that person, they just left from having to put a beloved pet down, and I simply encountered them during a time when they were grieving so deeply that they couldn’t even process the words I was saying; the next week when you met them, they were back to themselves. Or maybe that person is a jerk, but you happened to catch them on the day they won a big lottery prize, so they were feeling extra cheerful and friendly. Your experience with that person differs significantly from mine, so we’ve each formed a very different opinion about what kind of person he/she is. Or maybe, both viewpoints have some truth; perhaps that person is a lovely person who can be a jerk when they’re having a rough day, or that person is a jerk who can be nice when things are going well. This means that both of us are right, but at the same time, neither of us is. (Did that even make sense?) No amount of arguing is going to change either of our opinions of that person, because we each experienced something different.

When we disagree with someone, instead of screaming louder to make our voices heard, maybe we should try to understand where someone is coming from and why they feel the way they do. There are a lot of things that I don’t know, but what I do know is that our life experiences shape our beliefs, and because of that, we’re usually pretty set in what we think. I also know that insults will only close ears that might otherwise be willing to listen.

If there’s one thing we can all agree on, I think it’s that 2020 has been one jacked-up year, and the last thing we need is more negative energy. So, my contribution for the day is the featured image I chose for this blog–my sister’s cute puppy (look at that face).

So…to Facebook, or not to Facebook? For me, I guess that just depends on the insults to puppies ratio, how well the unfollow button works, and whether or not people will ever learn to have respectful, civil discussions.