What Will it Take?

With the ALA conference, work, and everything else that has kept me busy lately, I have had little time to write. Today, I really felt the need to sit down and write about an issue that’s been weighing heavily on my mind… the missing toddler, baby Noah.

My local friends will know exactly what I’m talking about, but some of you may not. Noah went missing almost a week ago. The news issued missing child posts for him, and many people have commented saying that they believe his mother had something to do with his disappearance. There are several reasons people immediately suspected her:

In 2010, his mother spent several months in jail for putting her 1-year-old daughter on a hot stove, resulting in severe burns. She said that the child fell over onto the hot stove.
The mother is a known drug user.
Still in her 30s, the mother has a lot of kids, and I don’t think she had custody of all of them (if any).

I base all the above points on what I’ve read. But the exact details aren’t why I’m writing about this. I’m writing about this because the situation upsets me immensely. The questions that keep flying around in my mind are probably the same questions that you have.

First, WHY does she keep having kids? I don’t understand this. If you’re addicted to drugs, why would you keep bringing children into the world, knowing that they will only suffer along with you? Why not get on birth control? I understand that responsible sex is not an addict’s priority, but there’s birth control out there that lasts 5 years. One visit to the doctor—just one visit—and you aren’t bringing innocent children into the world who, if they remain with you, will undoubtedly live in misery. Will there ever be a time when enough becomes enough, and people are made to go on birth control? Vaccinations are mandatory for those who want their children to go to public school, aren’t they? So why can’t addicts be required to use birth control? I understand that a woman’s body is hers, but what about the innocent children she keeps making? You know, the ones who get left on hot stoves, go missing, or have to be put in foster care? At what point does it become more about the innocent, and less about “it’s my body to do with as I please,”?

Second, WHY after being charged with felony child neglect (or abuse) would anyone be permitted to keep any of their kids? I realize that courts, CPS, and many others believe that a child’s place is with their mother when at all possible, but at what point do they say, “No more chances—this person is unfit to care for children,”? I suppose that laws and policies must be followed, which I imagine often ties both the courts’ hands, and CPS’s hands.

Any of you who know me know that I have a soft spot for people suffering with addiction; but when children become involved, that’s a whole different beast. One thing about addicts is that when they’re actively in addiction, there’s only one thing they care about and we all know what that is. To entrust children to them if we believe they’re not clean is asinine. Something desperately needs to change… but what? Laws, maybe? I don’t know—I’m not a lawyer or a politician; I’m like many of the people who are out there scratching their heads, and unable to stop wondering, “How did this happen?”, and “What will it take to keep it from happening again?”

The police believe that little Noah is deceased and that, as most of us suspected, his mother is responsible for his death. I hope that changes are made soon. It’s too late to change little Noah’s fate, but while it’s still fresh—while we are still outraged by it all—we should reach out to the people who can change things.

If you live in Virginia, and don’t know who your representative is, here’s where you can find out: https://whosmy.virginiageneralassembly.gov

I don’t even know if this is where to start, but if not, these folks should be able to point us in the right direction.

We can’t fix things for Noah, but hopefully, with a large enough outcry, we can change the future… even if it only helps one child, our efforts are not in vain.